Of the many contradictions that exist in the world, the contrast between love and hate is perhaps the starkest. It is one that helps us value true love while understanding the ramifications of hatred.
Many people are misguided when they think that true love will pull them through the hard times. The lie destroys many relationships between people who think that the pain and suffering is too great to stay committed to and therefore it was not true love. The reality is that no relationship has true love until after they allow themselves to die in the process of keeping the commitment they made. If you realize this truth then you will be able to look beyond the trials and focus on the prize that awaits you on the other side. Keep your eyes focused on the true love that you will eventually enjoy as a result of faithfulness. It will not soften the hateful emotions you suffer now, but it will make survival possible. If you allow yourself to open your eyes to the fact that your soul mate is also required to suffer the same tempering then you may be able to get over the "that's not fair" emotions. As you both hang on with everything in you, you will begin to build trust in each other when you see that they have remained faithful. That is the point when the trials begin to soften.
Then the next trial will come and it will be hotter than the last. It is another opportunity to make your love more true.